It’s Been One Week

One week ago today was the first day of my life with only one job (technically only one source of income) so I thought it would be a good time for check in.

In the past seven days, I spent at least 45 hours at my day job, 4 of the past 7 days playing overnight nursemaid to a friend who is in post-surgery discomfort, received training for my CPR/ First Aid Certificate and chose a theme and designed all the decor for a major Open House evening happening in a few weeks at my school.  This involved selecting colour schemes, creating displays and maps, outlining and distributing duties, ordering props and backdrops and shopping for the best deals on decor items.

I didn’t dislike any of the work I was doing.  For the most part, I like my job, care deeply for and was honoured to help my post-op buddy, love learning new things (and getting certified) and always enjoy event planning because it gives me the chance to flex my floral designer muscles, the work I trained for and played at before stumbling into teaching.

But, in the end, the hours I used to spend preparing for and teaching yoga and intentionally removed to experience more non-doing were immediately consumed with other things.   Times just sitting and being were filled with an uncomfortable restlessness and a desire to self-medicate with mindless screen time.

Apparently non-doing in is not in my body’s vocabulary.  Why wouldn’t I find this challenging?

I don’t recall a time in my life that I wasn’t working.  As a child, doing daily chores around the house was as expected as doing your homework or bathing.  Even during summer holidays, there was a feeling of “getting caught” if someone walked into a room to find you just sitting.  Then, as soon as we were old enough, my siblings and I began delivering newspapers and continued until we were ripe enough to get a job as a clerk or waitress.  When my parents opened a retail flower shop, we all either worked there or at one of the eventual subsidiary companies to our small shop; landscaping or catering.  I recall working as a floral designer creating all the floral designs for a wedding until after midnight, showing up early the next day to decorate the church and the hall, then going home to shower just in time to be a cater-waiter at the very same event.  Exhaustion was never close to the level of tiredness that I felt after those marathon shifts.  

I don’t even have a sense of what my body would do in times of non-doing.  So far, it seems to be going into a systems crash.  When I sit, I need to be distracted or I fall asleep.  Hmmm.

But the news is not all bad.  This week, I’ve been going to bed earlier which makes getting up earlier even easier and gives me some wonderful pre-dawn time for my aerobic prostrations (think spiritual, meditation-based burpee), meditation and yoga practice.  This morning’s 6-minute headstand sent my energy level through the roof and increased my desire to kick this aversion to non-doing right in the ass!